you mean i was at the winter classic?
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
