I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Randomize
