i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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