Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
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