Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
