you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Randomize
