Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I'm at about main and main street
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
