I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
