i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
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