at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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