Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
