The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I look better un-naked...
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize