I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
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