Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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