you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
