Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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