It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize