p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
