i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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