She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
The feeling are messing with the penis
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
