Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
