Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
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