How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
The struggles of a small town man whore
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
