Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
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