Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
