i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I AM VODKA MAN
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
there is glitter all over my balls
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