carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Randomize
