I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
