Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
