he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
