dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
