whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
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