i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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