Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize