in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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