Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize
