I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
