i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
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