So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
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