I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i don't like sucking hair
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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