I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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