we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize