I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
