We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
