im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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