Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
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