Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
i would one night stand the shit outta him
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
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