okay pat passed out under dana's car
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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