this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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