I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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